Careful, Doc, She Bites
by mysticxf
Summary: Sawyer and Jack have a talk.


Lost belongs to the fun people. I borrowed them for kicks. This title jumped in my head, so I had to write a story surrounding it. Sawyer and Jack have a talk.

Lost – Careful, Doc, She Bites  
By Mystic  
February 2005

Sawyer made his way along the beach, a smile playing on his face. It was just how he was and it drove the others insane. Most beachgoers didn't even look at him anymore and he found the more cheerful he was, the more they thought he had some big secret, the more they stared. He liked the staring. Sawyer liked being the center of attention, especially on this island.

Jack was seated in front of a middle aged man with glasses wearing some Hawaiian looking shirt. The doctor was wrapping a small bandage around one of the older man's fingers.

Pointing, Sawyer started, "Just a scratch far as I can see, no need to waste a perf…"

Jack glanced up at him. "Give me your MD and I'll take your medical advice."

Sawyer grinned again and grinned the small bag in his hands. It was made of jean material, the kind a girl would have gotten herself in middle school when jeans were 'cool' and everything should have been made of the material or looked to be made of the material. Sawyer didn't like to think much on the people he took from off the plane. It had actually come off some older woman who'd probably gotten it off the goodwill because she was stingy. He tossed it from one hand to another, the contents rattling with each passing.

"Just wantin' to donate to the medicine cabinet there, Doc."

Standing, Jack looked down at the man he'd been treating. "It should be fine, just keep it dry and clean. If it swells or starts turning red, come find me in the caves."

The man nodded and Jack walked away with Sawyer. "Why you baby them so much?" Sawyer asked, throwing the older man, who'd turned back to watch them, a dirty look.

"They just need reassuring. Not all of us are as confident as you, Sawyer." He paused, then added, "So what do you have and what to you want for it?"

"Whoa, whoa, Doc, why assume I want anything?" He grinned.

Jack shook his head and smiled at him, annoyed. "Because that's how you work. You barter, you don't contribute. That would be civilized."

Sawyer came to the water's edge, to where there were still indent marks from where Kate had been not long before and he shrugged. "Ain't no use to me." He handed the bag to Jack.

Jack watched him a moment before pulling the zipper across the top of the bag and peering inside. He let himself laugh. "You brought me birth control pills?"

Raising a finger to his mouth, Sawyer hissed, "Don't make it sound like that."

"Like what?" Jack asked.

"Weird." Sawyer replied quickly. "Just take the pills and do what you do with 'em. Invent some new cure for the common sunburn or something."

Jack sipped the bag up and held it in his hands, putting his feet into the indentation marks. The tide had gone out and the water lapped the shore a few yards away.

"Or, you could use it," Sawyer commented, watching Jack's sneakers dig into the holes in the sand.

"For what?" Jack laughed.

'Come on, Tarzan, you ain't got a Jane on this island? Wild girl, crazy hair, likes to climb trees and toss you fruit."

"Kate," Jack said simply. "She's not my Jane."

Sawyer's smile widened. "That what you think," he stated in a matter-of-fact tone. He brushed his hair away from his eyes, not even annoyed when it slipped back in front of them. He always had untamed hair. It suited him. Some girls thought it made him sexy. He didn't mind the idea.

"Yes, Sawyer, that's what I think." Jack made sure to use proper English, accenting the possessive.

Sawyer's nostrils flared. "Just 'cause she ain't holed up in the caves don't mean she ain't waiting somewhere in a tree for you to come prancing along the trails for her to chat it up with."

"What?" Jack asked. He scrunched his eyes to stare out at the ocean, away from the other man.

Sawyer put his hands together and smiled. "Don't pay no mind to it, do you, Doc?"

"To what?"

Laughing, Sawyer said simply, "Girls."

Sawyer began to walk back to his tent. There'd be liquor and food and dirty magazines waiting for him there. He preferred it that way.

"Sawyer!" Jack hollered. He waited until the other man turned. "What else are you hiding."

With a grin, Sawyer told him. "Trade ya a condom for a pair of workable scissors and some clean underwear."

"What?" Jack shook his head in disbelief.

Sawyer pointed at him and smiled. "Oh, you heard me alright." He started back to his tent again, but turned around quickly. "Hey Doc." He waited until Jack had looked up at him. "Careful, she bites."

It was a tease, something to send Jack's brain into a frenzy and Sawyer could see by the look on his face it worked. He laughed to himself as he started again in the other direction, figures the good doctor would be embarrassed by the idea of sex with Kate. He was tempted to run back and continue teasing, but Sawyer knew better than to push his luck.

He threw himself into the tent and looked back at Jack. He watched the way the other man stood in place, perplexed. He was really thinking about it now, Sawyer knew. If he thought hard enough… Sawyer watched Kate emerge from the jungle, her clothes clinging tightly to her body as she snuck up on Jack, not bothering to pay attention to the blue tarp with the man inside a hundred feet away.

Sawyer shifted on the Oceanic chair and snuggled in for a mid-day's rest. He started to smile, but he heard the duo break into laughter and it stung his heart.

Finis


End file.
